Mat Rempit - An excellent idea to eradicate the menace

An article in The Star on 8^th May 2009, said the Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Musa Hassan, was keen on the idea of setting up rehabilitation centers for illegal racers, instead of merely punishing them. This is indeed an excellent idea. We know that the Mat Rempits are merely youngsters, and punishing them physically or sending them to jail will only make them feel more outcasted from society, and when they were put back into the main stream, they might have a tendency to act in an anti establishment manner. Many times, violence begets violence.

The honorable IGP had also said, “Discipline must be instilled in youngsters and the responsibility lies with the families, the parents, relatives and siblings”. Yes, he hit it right on the head. The police were and are, not responsible for instilling discipline to youngsters. The responsibility lies with the families and friends, and also to a large extent to the schools. The police can only serve out punishments.

In the same article, Kelantan Menteri Besar Datuk Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat seem to have said, regarding convicted snatch thieves and Mat Rempits, “These people are getting out of hand. They should be caned or punished in painful ways so that they can be taught a lesson”. Here, I beg to differ a little. Mat Rempits should not be bunched together with the snatch thieves, even though there might be one or two cases of Mat Rempits being involved in those despicable crimes. Snatch thieves are not all teenagers or youths. There are adults involved.

We must also think of the agony the families of the convicted youths go through with the thought of their offsprings undergoing severe punishments, due to their own failure in leading their loved ones to the rightful path.

But the honorable Menteri Besar’s reasoning that the younger generation was getting involved in unhealthy activities because they lacked Islamic knowledge and were idling too much, is very true. Rehabilitation centers do instill religious values, among other programs. It is very apt to send the wayward Mat Rempits to rehabilitation centers, as well as do community services. But do not let the snatch thieves go off easily. Let them undergo real deterrent punishments.

To the non-Malaysian readers, 'Mat Rempits' are those teenagers who race their motorbikes on public roads, often doing dangerous stunts, like lifting front wheels  off the road, disregarding the danger they pose to the other road users.

What they do in a cyber cafe

Cyber cafes are supposed to be places where people go to send emails, write letters, surf the web and do school assignments, print, scan, etc. But what is actually happening is, youngsters are playing away computer games at almost all the computer shops which have network facilities. I should know, for I had operated a cyber café for about four years, six years back in Taiping, from year 1999. So, I think it might interest you to know what actually happened, in a cyber café. I will tell you the actual going ons in my cyber café, for you to make your own opinion regarding the good and bad of the outlets.

Apart from selling and repairing computers, I also ran the cyber café business. My shop had only twelve computers, then. I will normally open the shop for business at about 9 am. in the morning. Even at that time, a few boys will be waiting outside the shop, waiting anxiously for me to open the shop doors. Mind you, they will even stand around me when I was unlocking the doors, so that they can rush inside and pick good places! They should know because they were the very regular users. They knew which computers were smooth and which were not! These were schoolboys of the afternoon sessions. They lived in the kampungs and tamans around my shop. They will go back home after playing and loitering in the shop for about two to three hours. They will come back again wearing uniforms, and play some more! There were one or two boys who, once in a while, will shed off their school uniforms and wear normal clothes, and continue playing or loitering in the shop! Their reasons on enquiring were, they were on medical leave or not well, and will be going to clinic. Some morning session boys will come to the computer shop first, at about 2pm after school, play games or do some internet chatting, and only then go home.

I did not allow any cigarette smoking in my shop, even though it was not air-conditioned. Not even in the bathroom. I did catch a few of them trying to puff away at the back, near the bathroom and they were strongly warned of not being admitted inside, if they were caught again. They stopped. Even adults were no exception. And when using the internet, nobody was allowed to go into adult websites. Strictly forbidden, with notices on the wall. Many a times, did I catch my customers, both adults and schoolboys, trying to browse adult sites. They were told not to do so, in strong terms. Believe me, even boys as young as ten knew how to enter the smut sites, due to their constant minglings with their senior friends!

Online chatting, using the various chat programs in the net, was the next popular thing for those clients of mine. They can chat away for hours. People showed various reactions on their faces and actions while chatting. Some smiled, some laughed, patting the shoulders of their friends sitting beside, and there was a girl who even shed tears, while doing her chatting.

Writing letters or doing school assignments were quite impossible in my place, when the boys were playing the network games, for they will be shouting around instructions and challenging one another, often using vulgar words. Games of ‘Half Life’ and ‘Counter Strike’ were the clear favourites, which solely involved searching and killing the adversaries, using various warfare weapons.

Parents, too, often brought their children, even as young five or six years old, to my place so that these children could familiarize themselves with the first feelings of the computers. I had installed a few computer games for the children, and it became my enthusiastic responsibility to teach these children how to play the games, using the mouse and the various keys of the keyboard. I loved to see their eyes of bewilderment and excitement while they played the games!

Several incidents had discouraged me from continuing with my computer business, the main one being the gradual lessening in the business income, due to strong competitions from the newly opened cyber cafes around the area. Other incidents mainly pertained to the addiction of schoolboys to the computer games and their loitering in my shop. Once, a lady in a nurse’s uniform came inside and took her teenager son away, after whacking him in front of the others in the shop, and to my chagrin, shouting at me that he was never in the house, because of my shop. Another day, a gentleman also did the same thing with his son, only this time he just shouted at him. Being a sensitive person at heart, I had felt very guilty, then, and finally decided to put a stop to this business.





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Tea time - relax

Hunter to Native: Did you see a short man with a white, black-stripped cap passing this way?

Native: Oi…oi sah, me see him in a taigar’s mouth, but no cap!

Hunter: Well, where could have it fallen?

Teacher: Govind, you have ten apples that you have to give to four of your friends. What will you do?

Govind: Make into juice, sir, and give them each a glass.

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A great day

I know a great day;

A day of excitement, happiness,

A day that makes children gay

A day deserving a good bless.

I know a great day;

A day of intense glee,

A day people love, and always may;

The Indian festival of Deepavali!

Soldiers’ march

We go to war! We go to war!

Fighters of a great battalion we are!

Fight we will, for our country and people

And rejoice to die in a war or battle!

To us this is a grand moment

So, too, for our great armament!

Rest not we, until our enemies’ defeat

And will fight on until their full retreat.

Life

What is life?

“Life,” groans the wretched one,

“ is mere frustration,

unhappiness,

despair,

depression….”

“Life is joy!”

shouts the one with a glamorous face,

“Life is happiness,

a celebration,

an excitement.”

Utters, then, the wise one,

“Life is neither happiness,

nor joy.

It is both.”

And doesn’t he prevail?

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Having fun with opportunity

A well known saying says ‘opportunity knocks but once at every man’s door’

The other day, I heard a knock on my door. Thinking that it was opportunity, I opened the door. It was the bill collector!

Opportunity, sometimes, even tries to break the door open, but the occupant had made it too strong.

Many remain poor because when opportunity knocked on their doors they were out.

Do not leave your doors open all the time. Give opportunity the chance to knock on the door, or else, instead of opportunity, something else will enter the house.

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Whose fault?

My daddy once said to me,

“Son, life is but a short one,

so eat, drink and be merry.”

“Yes, sir.” I told him.

So I ate, drank and was merry!

“And son,” my daddy said to me, one day,

“you live but once,

so have wine, woman and songs.”

“Yes, sir.” I told him.

So I had wine, woman and songs.

Then, one day, at noon,

My daddy went away,

to the unknown.

And I was left all alone,

with not a soul to care,

my pockets bare.

All I could do was drink;

All I had were songs.

So I drank

and I sang.

Some called me a drunk,

and some called me mad.

Many said, “he is just a lad,

how sad! how sad! .

But, really, it was my dad,

who was all I had.

If be without

What is life,

Without its scattered,

Little moments of joy;

A tragedy!

What is love,

Without a soul

To share it with;

Just a pain in the heart.

What is hope,

Without a trickle of faith

In itself;

Hopeless.

What is wealth,

Without its effects

On a man’s defects;

Just load,

What is truth,

Without its acceptance

And belief;

A fantasy.

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A worker was brought before the manager on a complaint.

“Didn’t you,” asked the manager, “hear your supervisor clap his hands to call you?

“Yes, sir, I heard it,” said the worker, a man of pride, “but I thought he was hitting mosquitoes.”

Take your pick!

Crazy about rambutans but pockets empty? Don’t fret. Follow these instructions and have your heart’s fill! No stealing, perfectly straight!

Just venture to a rambutan stall under the pretext of buying the fruit. Haggle about the price and quality. You don’t have to wait for long. To the vendor, his fruits are always the best in the territory. To prove his point, he shall offer you one to test for yourself. Of course, he would have given you the best one from his pick, and dare you to disagree. Only that he doesn’t know you have already prepared yourself to dare! After ravishing the rambutan, hint that you are not satisfied. There are many ways of doing this. You can make some lizard sounds. You can shake your head from side to side. Or you can twitch your mouth and say, “never mind”. Go to the next stall, and proceed with the same procedure and end up with a crack at another one of the best rambutans in the territory!

Go to as many stalls as you want, or rather, your stomach wants! One thing though, don’t go to the same stall again, by mistake. Know what I mean?

And the bomoh predicted that before month was out, someone in the kampong will die. He did.

The audience applauded tremendously, after the song ended, not because the song was good, but because he had ended their good mannered, quiet suffering.

Women! They talk so much about their rights. What about their wrongs?

I won’t get very high in life because I am afraid of heights.

LIFE

A short essay on Life, that I wrote while schooling. Please read through, patiently!

Life can be told as a long story written by God on a book called ‘the world’. Life consists essentially of many turns of events. At one time a person experiences adversities, while at another, happiness and gaiety are the substitutes. Thus, life does not, in any way, exist on an uniform, standard and stationary scale. It varies considerably, continuously.

Famous persons have described life in many remarkable ways. The great and well- known Elizabethan author, William Shakespeare, has described the earth and life by his saying, “All the world is a stage. And all the men and women merely players”. By the above maxim, he does not, really, literally mean that the world is truly a stage and that it fully consists of true actors or players. The real meaning lies deep inside the statement. William Shakespeare has cleverly compared the world with the stage and the people living on it with the players. The statement, surprisingly, seems to strike its intended meaning. On the stage are players who continuously undergo remarkable turns of events, of which both adversities and happiness are the chief constituents. When the life on earth is painstakingly compared with that of the play on the stage, they astonishingly seem to be similar in most respects, if not all.

Life, on being studied carefully, seems to have curiously innumerable varieties of hardships and mishaps. An innocent and only child who, all at once, looses both his parents in a mishap, is indeed without the slightest doubt, under the unimaginable mercy of cruel life. He may subsequently be torn down by this kind of life. Yet, he may see a bright future ahead of him and may suddenly be in a glorious moment, with an unexpected change of events. This is possible because a childless or passionate wealthy person may decide to adopt him as his son and gradually pave the way for him to the of heavenly future. Such is the curious changes of events that life possesses.

The adversities, mishaps and hardships are significant causes of crimes such as robberies, murders, rapes, riots, suicide, swindles and countless other violent commotions and chaos. Failure of a long expected success may change the mobile mind of a person, and thus, depress him to a great extent. Hatred for life may later carve him out into an unlawful person. The material world may tempt him to achieve his aims by using the short route method of lawlessness.

The optimistic sides of life are very pleasant to imagine. Millions of people in the world, especially, in the advanced nations such as the USA, Britain, France, Germany and Japan, just to mention a few, are dwelling in the lap of luxury, with homely cars, state of the art homes with ample facilities, the means to travel anywhere they like and nourish whatever food their taste buds desire!

In the poor and overpopulated parts of the world, life is nothing but a continuous path of thorns, along which people of these places have to walk. Such is the case of the way of life in countries like India, China, Nepal, Myanmar, Sudan and many others. Everyday, thousands of poverty stricken people in these nations go on living, and dying without food. Life is, thus, sometimes extremely cruel and sometimes incredibly pleasant.

The world, at this moment, is in the state of chaos. Wars, fights, riots, bomb attacks are taking forms all around the once peaceful world, if one can call it peaceful, what with some sort of calamities occurring always somewhere. The lack of jobs does not, in the least, favour the situation. The present age can be unhesitatingly said as an age of mass and strong competition. In such a situation, to obtain a stout and permanent foothold on the optimistic side of life, one should indeed work hard strenuously, compete courageously with others and win.

Life starts with the gradual birth of an infant and continues until his unavoidable, ultimate death. One should, therefore, to obtain an everlasting and prosperous position in life, commence putting his very best effort, the very moment he is matured enough to know this very, wide world.

How was the essay above? I got an 'A' for it! Ha ha! That encouraged me to write some more!

Anything goes

You are the world
One drop of water
Just from your very one eye,
Will bring
Rain, pouring from the sky!

From your lips
Just one smile,
Will bring
Laughter, echoing for a mile!


Hawker: Ice cream! Ice cream!
Little girl: You are right!
Surprised hawker: What do you mean, I am right?
Little girl: You scream!

“Keep the change,” said the generous customer, “if there is any.”

Govind: You are showing your true colours now!
Samy: Yes, you are right. But I thought you said you are colour blind!

A man: Haven’t I seen your face somewhere?
The other man: No, you couldn’t have. I take it with me always.

Govind: How many seas are in an ocean?
Samy: Sixty?
Govind: No, there is only one ‘c’ in an ocean!

Girl: My boss turns into a doctor whenever I ask for a raise.
Her friend: How come?
Girl: He asks me to be patient.

The fat rat ate the cat and the mat!

Ron: Where in hell is Bob, Sam?
Sam: He should be there, somewhere. He died last week.

Village doctor: Did that medicine I gave do any good to your wife?
Man: Yes, doc. It made her go to the hospital, next day!

Judge: Why did you point a knife at that man?
Thief: Because I did not have a gun.

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Poor beggar
His eyes are closing…closing…closed!
He is asleep now, fast asleep.
Him – no one can goad;
For he is in a world, too deep.

He lies on a carpet, dirty and small
It serves him now, as a bed
His chest does not rise, or fall;
For he is dead!

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Office boy: There is a man with a moustache outside, sir.
Manager: Tell him I have one already.

Office boy: There is a man outside, sir?
Manager: Does he have a beard?
Office boy: No, sir, only a suitcase.

A man (proudly): My son builds airplanes during free time.
Another man: That’s nothing. My son builds castles in the air.

Manager to job applicant: Can you type well?
Applicant: Yes, sir. I can type other words, too!

Stranger: Can you tell me where is the street to Mr. Sam’s house?
Man: Well, this is Mr. Sam’s house and that’s the street you want.

An alarm clock is there to alarm you that you didn’t wake up, when it rang.

English grammar lesson: Although he is tall he is short.

Two small boys were proudly comparing their mothers,
“You know,” said one, “my mum uses red house-paint on her lips!”
“That’s nothing, “ replied the other one, “my mum puts gun-powder on her face!”

Car salesman: Hello, sir! How is the car I sold to you last week?
Man: Oh, it’s still alive and…kicking!

“Hello,” said one, “ is it the police? I want to report a theft. A girl has stolen my heart!”


About honesty
You buy, say,about seventy sen’s worth of goods, give the shopkeeper a one ringgit note and start walking away, in the pretense that you have forgotten about the change of thirty sen. The shopkeeper, unhesitatingly calls after you and returns you the change. You, of course, accept it with a sheepish grin and a big, “Thank you”.
On another day, you shop another seventy sen’s worth of goods. This time you give the shopkeeper a ten ringgit note and walk away without the change. Only this time the shopkeeper doesn’t call after you. He, in fact, waits anxiously for you to disappear from sight. Where has the honesty gone? Well, thirty sen is one thing, but an easy nine ringgit and thirty sen is another thing altogether! Such is the honesty of the world.


Then, there is the case of a boy who wrote to world leaders to stop all wars and treaties at all cost because the history books were getting thicker!

The case of many young man today:
Before marriage, “My life is empty without you.”
After marriage, “ My life is empty with you.”

There is uncertainty of God rewarding those who do good. But there is one thing you can never doubt. Those who sin are punished, surely.

“ My heart belongs to no one but you,” said the girl to her fiancé.
“Oh great!” said her fiancé, a heart transplant surgeon.


When in Rome do as Romans do – some updates!
When in Rome do as Rome ants do.
When in Rome do romance.
When in home do as Romans do.
When in Rome, roam.

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“Dar..li.ng, “ muttered the old man on his deathbed, “ I am… go.ing..to…tell you…a… sec.r.et.. I have…kept..for..all…this..si.x.ty…two..years!”
“What is it dear?” asked his wife, eagerly.
“I…I… h..ave…f.a.l.s.e….t..e..e..t..h!” said the man.

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The mirror
The mirror
Doesn’t just show your face.
It shows your moods, too;
When you are angry,
or sad’
wary,
or glad
Your face betrays them all to
The mirror.

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Optician: Ma’am, how many birds can you see over there?
The lady: Well, let me see now, ..one..er..two…er..three…four! Am I right?
Optician: No, ma’am.You are wrong. There aren’t any.


You can kill more than two birds with one stone, too, if you choose a bigger stone and there are more birds in the bush. It is the same with life: you will receive more success with greater effort.


Optician: Sir, can you see the poster on that wall?
Man with poor eyesight: Wall? What wall?

“My son,” boasted the father, “is in the cabinet!”
“My son should know,” said his companion, “he makes them.”

“You know something,” said the man, “ my son has a key job overseas.”
“Really?” inquired his new friend, impressed, “What does he do?”
“He makes keys.”


Have you heard about a judge who charged a man of robbery, for robbing a woman of her honour?

Epitaph on the grave of an extremely lazy person:
“HERE FINALLY LIES WILSON”

Friends are like birds. They fly away in times of trouble.

Announcement on a radio:
Here are the outcome of soccer matches played between various teams.
Oldcastle versus Spoke City – one killed, two injured.
Kidneypool versus East Ham – three injured, one in coma.
Chelland versus Moonderland – two injured.
Boychester United versus Portsnose – one injured.
Whiteburn Rovers versus Tottenlamb Coolspur – two in coma

“I used to worry a lot about my falling hair. Now I don’t!”
“Really? Give me your secret!”
“No secret. No hair left.”

Benson was a great one for lying. He lied to everyone everywhere. He, now, lies in his grave.


Talking about movies, there are three types; movies that make you sit right back in your seat, movies that make you sit on the edge of your seat, and movies that will make you vacate your seat.


Man on seeing the beggar to whom he had given a ringgit earlier, coming out from a bar:
I thought I told you not to drink whisky with the money I gave you!
The beggar: No, sir. It was brandy!”

Once the mouth said to the ear, ”You know what,” it boasted, “I am the most active organ on the head. I talk, yell, cry, laugh, whisper, whistle, jeer, sing, drawl, whoop, yelp, scream……..”
“Yeah, yeah,” cut in the ear, “but without me they are of no use.”

Peele: You know something, this is an unlively place.
Bob: You can say that again.
Peele: You know something, this is an unlively place.

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Of happiness
One who pretends to be happy can never be as happy as the one who pretends to be sad.

Happiness comes naturally to the poor. To the rich, it is forced every hour.

The happiness of the poor is real, natural and lasting for the while it lasts. That, of the men of riches, is merely temporary and of pretense.

The happiness of the wealthy comes from the feeling of pride; pride of possession of properties, of status. Hence, to them pride is happiness. To the man in want, happiness is happiness.

Obama is a Precedent ...of USA

It has been just over 100 days of Barack Obama’s presidency in USA now, but the hysteria and phobia over Obama still hasn’t waned, at least, not with me.

 Well, maybe a little. I have been, ardently, following his every move since he started his campaign against John McCain. And it got more exciting when he campaigned against Hilary Clinton. After work, I will be glued to the TV for the latests on Obama. The TV was no more the ‘idiot box’! It got so bad that I heard my wife grumbling about she missing her favorite serials! I dare say the same or similar situations have happened in many households throughout the world. Why? The reason is obvious. For the first time an Afro American, a minority race, in a nation of mostly whites, was in the limelight for the Presidency of the most powerful nation in the world. And, now, he is the president! The miracle has happened! It is a miracle because a person of previously downtrodden race, by the whites, ( forgive me for rekindling the ugly side of history a little ) has been able hold the highest post in the world. Of course, the socially advanced white Americans had voted him in, not to mention about his own minority race.

 The white Americans have, at last, openly, demonstrated their maturity and acceptance of anything good. They have got back some self respect in the process. Minority races all over the world have rejoiced openly or embarrassingly inwards. They are extremely happy for Barack H. Obama! They hope the best for him. He is one of them now! The high ratings that he obtained for his first 100 days of presidency have pleased them immensely!

Only those strange facts of life

A man is doctored from death to life; only to be hanged by the court.

A lonely person feels envy for the popularity and abundance of friends of another person. Only that the other person feels more lonely.

A man plans, imagines and thinks of all the things he will do in the world if he has a windfall of a large amount of money. Only that when he really has it, the money goes in all the wrong directions.

A girl loves a boy exceedingly. Only that she has a craze to hurt his feelings.

A man on the brink of death thinks and promises of all the good thinks he will do if given life. Only that when really given life, he goes on as usual.

A soldier stands the loudest and most the distorting of noise. Only that he couldn’t stand the soft music of mosquitoes near his ear.

A soldier at war faces his enemies under all odds and fights them off. Only that, at home, he couldn’t face the angry face of his wife.

A lawyer presents all his best evidence and witnesses and upholds the innocence of his client.
Only that all the time his client was as guilty as hell.

A student nods his head to everything his teacher says. Only that he couldn’t grasp the head from the tail.

A doctor prescribes all sorts of food to his patient to make him fat. Only that he himself is thin.

A baby cries at the top of her voice. Only that she is happy.

The staffs are all teeth as they welcome their boss. Only that they wish he will depart as soon as possible.

A neighbour switches on his radio at full blast. Only that he is not listening.

The workers laugh aloud and long at their boss’s joke. Only that it is not a joke at all.

A man tells his friend he is not afraid of ghosts at all. Only that when he is all alone and in the dark a chill runs along his spine.

A fortune teller acclaims that he can make the poor become rich. Only that he himself remains poor.

Quotes from famous person

Judge not a person by his figure and speech but judge him by his heart and deeds.

If the persons who plead with the people to improve the nation, will only improve themselves first, then there will be improvement in the nation.

Wealth is no obstacle to true friendship. Nor is poverty.

Try again and again and you will never succeed, unless you put your heart into it.

The right and true kind of friendship is not made. Is cultivated.

Man may have created robots. But he is the immortal robot of God.

Selfishness, we must know, is the root of all evils. Not money.

To master life, don’t take life as a challenge. Regard yourself as a challenge to life.

If you ask me, the only thing common between men and women is ‘men’.

After all said and done the human race still can’t win the animal race.

Life will be kind to the one who aims for the best but expects the worst.

Money can make a friend. Money can also kill that friend.

The success of a speech does not depend on the way the speaker puts forward his ideas, but rather, on the way the listeners put forward their ears.

Just as food is necessary to keep a man alive, faith is necessary to keep his hopes alive.

Luck is pure coincidence. Good luck is good coincidence. Bad luck, bad.

Talking about pastimes, the safest, simplest, cheapest is still sleeping.

I am the Minister of Own affairs.

Be sure you are laughed with, not laughed at.

Look before you leap, and where you land.

Gambling - winning it all back, one day.

Here is ambition to you. If you have a driving license, you can only be the driver of a car.If you have a driving license and ambition, you can possess that car.

No other game is more hurting on losing than the game of love.

Man is still to learn from dog of gratitude.

It is the man with inferior complex who boasts – to make others accept him as one of them or even better.

The job of a magician is to prove that we are all fools.

You strike your dog and the next time it sees you, it will still come to you with a wagging tail. That’s loyalty for you.

Life hasn’t got a dull moment
When you’ve got a lot of money.

You should be wondering who is that famous person who said all of the above. It is me! (Smirk!)

The child in us

Short Poems

The sound

O’, What is that sound
That so thrills the ear,
Like the heart of a man
Which is in fear?

But not a man can I see,
No, not even a sign.
By God, it’s me!
The heart is mine!


Brave warriors

There go our brave warriors
To fight men like great barriers.
They carry with them only spears
But march with untold cheers!

Though their number is only ten
They can fight a hundred men,
For they have hearts of no chicken
And will fight like a mad lion!


The stars and the looter

Oh, look at those stars!
Just look at them!
See them shimmer, twinkle in a mass!
Ah! How content and happy and happy I am!
If only they can be mine,
No more will I steal.
I will sit here and watch them shine,
And no more will I kill!

Go and fight my merry man

Go and fight my merry men! Go and fight!
Fight the murderous enemies in sight.
Stop them from stepping on our land,
Teach them that they are not grand.

Chase them away far from here
And turn back proudly with cheer.
Be not afraid of your death;
God is there to care for your health.

Though one day you may be killed,
In our heart your courage will be filled.
So, go and fight my merry men, go and fight!
Fight the enemies of greed in sight!


The song of a beggar

Once went an old beggar, begging for food
To a large house, the palace of a king.
But the king was cruel and rude;
He mocked the beggar, laughing and teasing.

The poor beggar sang a song, so sweet, so wanting
That the stones began to melt, and the king cried!
His heart, too, felt the song and began melting
And the king wept, fell down and died!


The beautiful bird

There goes the beautiful bird
Flying in the air.
It is free now to see the world,
As long as it does care

Poor, bird, it has been kept in a cage
Made by expert hands.
Now it has an old age,
Too old to make young friends.


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Jokes

Teacher : What would you like to be when you are old Govind?
Govind : A young man again, sir!

Teacher : Govind, what is necessary for germination to take place?
Govind : Seed, sir!

Teacher : What are your favorite games, Govind?
Govind : Monkey and football, sir!

Teacher : Govind, can you tell me something about Abraham Lincoln?
Govind : Yes, sir. He is dead.

Science teacher : Govind, how will you prevent Malaria from spreading?
Govind : Eliminate all the people, sir!

Teacher : Would you like to be a millionaire person, Govind?
Govind : Yes, sir, please! My hair is getting less and less!

Teacher : Listen here, all of you. What will you do to share two apples between three of you
Govind : Buy one more, sir!

Civics teacher : Govind, suppose you have only one apple and there is a beggar looking at you. What will you do?
Govind : I will give it to the beggar, sir!
Teacher : And why?
Govind : I don’t like apples, sir.

Teacher : Name me a sense, Govind.
Govind : five cents, sir.

Teacher : Govind, why is Mt. Everest famous?
Govind : Many who go there ever rest there, sir!

Teacher : What do you call a man who can’t hear?
Govind : Nothing, sir. He can’t hear.

Dad : Your head is swollen, what happened?

Child : A post knocked me when I was not looking at it dad!

Judge : Do you want to say anything before you are hanged?

Prisoner : Yes, sir. Good bye!

Asami : Hey, Govind, I hear that guy is very tough and strong.

Govind : Yeah, when the guy’s head knocks against the post, the post gets swollen!

Man to robber : Hey, why don’t you tie me up? It will make nice headline tomorrow, “Reporter Tied Up And Home Ransacked!”

Robber : Well, it’s going to be better than that. How about “Reporter Killed” ?

Teacher : Govind, when were you born?

Govind : When I was much less than a year old, sir.

Friend of farmer : ‘Lo Bob! Your cattle and sheep, where are they? I can’t see any.

Farmer : Well, the kettle is on the oven. The ship is at the port.

Teacher : Why do fish live in water and not on land, Govind?

Govind : No legs to walk on land, sir.

Asami : How much did it cost you to see that show?

Govind: Four spanking from my dad and dried bread for lunch!

Magician to his helper : Get a rope and handkerchief.

Helper, sometime later: Finished, sir.

Magician : Finished what?

Helper : Got a rope and hanged the chief!

Jeff : You know something. My dad says he can smell my breath a hundred yards away!

Jim : That’s nothing. Mine says he can smell my breath through the phone!

“Oi,” said the rude boarder, “What’s the spider doing in my room?”

“Decorating, sir!” said the caretaker.

Feelings.....nothing more than feelings - 2

The speed of time
Days lead
And days appear
With such speed
That we wonder

Only yesterday
Seemed the new year
Today
The end is near!

Only yesterday
Were born the children
But today
They are men and women!

Only yesterday
Were clothes modern
Today
They are out off fashion!

Only yesterday
Were nations fair and just
But today
They are in disgust!

Only yesterday
Was the world in peace
Today
It is at war and mischieves!

Only yesterday
Did men fly to the moon
But today
They’ve walked on it, so soon!

Days lead
And days appear
With such speed
That we wonder.


Tears
Tears dropped down from his eyes,
In one drop…..
In two drops….
Then in a continuous flow of drops.
They rolled downwards
Like two tiny streams,
Along both cheeks.
They grazed the corners of the mouth
And converged
And collected at
The tip of the protruding chin.
Then, they dropped again,
In one drop…..
In two drops….
Then in a continuous flow of drops,
On to the heavy chest, where,
They seeped through
And soaked
The awaiting cloth.


The story of love
Love!
Poor love!
They say you are blind.
And yes!
How blind you are!
Grope your way you do,
So tiresomely,
So eagerly,
So searchingly.
Love!
Pitiful love!
Tender, suffering love!
Many a times do you
Enter
The wrong hearts
And get driven out,
Sometimes promptly,
Sometimes probationally,
Painfully!
Most of the times.
And yet,
Love!
Sweet, stunning love!
Glorious future
Awaits you in
The right hearts.
Embraced warmly you will be!
Enriched!
Beautified!
Given nourishment daily!
And made stronger till the
Gradual nonactiveness of
The hearts!

Parents to blame

 I can’t help thinking about the good old days, when, the newspapers were full of other stories, rather than crime. Girls can walk alone, without any worries. No bag snatching, no chain pulling, no kidnapping. 

Now, even the man has to look over his shoulders, constantly, to feel safe. Why? What has gone wrong? Is it the fault of the police? No! Definitely not! It is the parents! 

The police, only come at a latter part of a person’s life. Children should have had a moral upbringing, since young. Parents should have been stern, but understanding. It does not mean, punishing them for every mistake they make, but asking themselves, that is, their own selves, why they did it. Understanding them at their age, and acting, accordingly, is important. When a child is being disciplined in school, do not make police-reports, and create a feeling of animosity, between pupils and teachers. Children can only be brought to our way, when we start off with them, at a tender age, telling them what’s right, and what’s wrong, instilling in them a sense of pride, if they had done something remarkable or right, but disciplining them, correctly, there and then, when they go out of line. 

It will be quite difficult, and impossible, to control a person into our way of thinking, when he is older, and has a feeling of being having matured. There is an old Indian saying, “What can’t bend at five, won’t bend at fifty”.

Coffee Break 4 - relax

Who am I?
You find me in life, you find me in death.
I exist in your health and wealth
I am also in the middle of poverty
But alas! I can’t solve it, what a pity!
Though in nature, I come last
I rise to excellence very fast.
Without me, there is no love, or hate.
Why, I even conclude your fate!
Though it is me who begin the earth,
I, too, end up in grave, oh, no mirth!
And one good thing is, I start and end with ease.
Who do you think I am, answer please!


Answer : the letter e

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In reality, the peace that is worth achieving, by all means, is peace of mind.

If you want to know what regret is, just think of your past.

Boys will not be boys. They will be men!

God created man. Man created Gods.

The pen is mightier than the sword, but only when it has ink.

Life, I think, is not so miserable after all! It is worse!

He, who eats out of one’s hands, should not eat the one out.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Humour : Crring…..crring

“Crring…crring……….crring…crring!” rang out the telephone, breaking the graveyard silence of the night.

Pete moved in his bed and turned around to a new position.

“Crring…crring!”

Pete groaned, “Who the hell is phoning at this hour, the un….,” Pete stopped. He had made a vow to his mother not to curse. Mumbling, he got up reluctantly from his bed and trudged up, still dozed in his sleep, towards the telephone. Anger from being ruffled from a good night’s sleep was deep in his half-closed eyes. Reaching the table, he groped, in the partial darkness, for the telephone.
“Hello,” he croaked angrily, after he had picked up the receiver, or so he thought it was.

“Crring…crring!”

Pete was shocked. Where was that ringing coming from? Surely he was holding the receiver? He then fully opened his eyes and stared at the thing he was gripping. It was the torch!

“Crring….crring!”

Pete threw the torch on the table ( which fell with a loud bang and rolled on the table, only to fall on the concrete floor with a thunderous crash, its glass smashing away into various pieces ) and snatched up the receiver.

“Hello?” he demanded.

“Hello, good evening,” said a polite, feminine voice. It sounded as “Hello, good smashing,” to Pete’s ears at that moment.

“Good ev… well, what do you want?” Pete asked.

“Can I speak to Mr. Pitt, please?” the voice wanted to know.

“Go ahead, Pete here,” Pete introduced himself.

“Is it really Pitt?” the voice queried.

“Yes, I am Pete, as sure as you can’t see me in front of you now,” Pete replied.

“But Pitt, your voice has changed! You used to have a…..”

“Well, well,” cut in Pete impatiently, “ you didn’t ring at this hour to discuss my voice, did you?”

“No, no, of course not. But this is something important and it should be told to Pitt only.”

“And I say I am Pete.”

“But your voice….”

“My voice, my voice!” Pete really was at the climax of his temper, now. Who is this girl, after having woken him up, daring to insist that he was not Pete! “Now, look here, if you want to speak to Pete, go on. If you don’t want to speak to Pete, to whom do you want to gossip? Is it Preet, Pit or ….”

“But I want to speak to Pitt,” the girl uttered, unaffected by his rise in temper, “P for pea, I for eye, T for tea and T for ….”


“Toilet!” Pete was really furious, “I say I am Pete!”

“Well, no need to be so impolite, Pitt,” the girl said, casually, seeming convinced, “here is the message.”

“Yes?” Pete asked eagerly, like a man who had just escaped the bombing of his town.

“You are going to America, aren’t you? Well, I heard you are going to visit your sick father and I just want you to give him my deepest sympathy.”

“Hey!” Pete shouted loudly, “ I am not going to America and I am not going to visit any sick father of mine!”

“You don’t lie in front of your old niece, Dora, do you?” the girl sobbed.

“Dora? Who is Dora? I don’t know any Doras around!”

“I wonder….,” the girl at the other side muttered, “Hello, can you tell me your number, please?” she pleaded.

“Well, this is three…six…one…seven…”

“Three…six…one…seven? But I wanted two…six…one…oh, I am sorry. I’ve got the wrong number!”

Pete gulped, and before he could come out with a howl, the line was dead.

Feelings...nothing more than feelings

Examination results
The face has an anxious sign
The heart throbs suddenly! Silently!
A chill runs along the spine!
Is it fear? Is it glee?

“Here are the results!” the mouth mutters.
The body straightens up, with excitement, with fear!
The eyes stare, gaze at some letters
They glitter, “I’ve passed! Oh, God! Oh, dear!”

The heart shrieks for joy!
The mouth is wide, it smiles!
The legs are suddenly strong, why?
They want to run a hundred miles!


In the morning
I hear the flap of wings
And a cock crows through the silence
A bird on a tree sings
A car starts in the distance
A gate squeals around the corner
A bicycle squeals on the road
A gander cackles somewhere
A frog croaks, or is it a toad?
The old man coughs, next door
My old man stops snoring
Fowls crow as never before
It’s morning!


The sparkle in the eyes
A smile,
Without the sparkle in the eyes,
Is just an elongation of the mouth.
A grin,
Without the sparkle in the eyes,
Is merely a display of teeth.
Laughter,
Without the sparkle in the eyes,
Is just a noise from the vocal cord.
That sparkle in the eyes,
Is an oasis in the desert!
A ray of light in the dark!
The diamond, beyond human grasp!

Coffee Break 3 - relax

“I swear not to swear again,” sweared the boy to his mother.

“Do you love me?” the girl asked her boyfriend.
“Yes, and I love mee hoon, too,” he replied.

“I will commit suicide, after the wrestling match on TV,” decided the wrestling crazed chap who found life miserable.

“Doctor,” said the man, “I am getting more and more worried by the day, people say I have no heart!”

There are people who fall in love at first sight, marry and divorce on second sight!

Optican: Can you see that tree, over there?
Man : Well, as far as I can see, that’s as far as I can see.

“My brother,” boasted the cowboy to another, “can draw faster than any other bloke.”
“Yeah,” drawled the other one, “ I can see his paintings all over the town.”

Taiping, oh, beautiful, exciting Taiping!

The town of Taiping, where I live, is a beautiful place. It has one of the most beautiful lake gardens in Malaysia, if not the world. It has many heritage sites such as the prison, muzeum, Kota Ngah Ibrahim, Port Weld (Bukit Larut), railway station, colonial government buildings, military camps and others. It also has places for entertainment and vacations, such as the famous Taiping Zoo, Maxwell Hills (Bukit Larut), Bukit Merah Lake Town, etc. Recently, shopping complexes, namely, Tesco and Giant had been added to the attraction.

As such, more and more visitors are making a leeway to Taiping. Unfortunately, they are not being given a reasonable and exciting welcome to the place. A food factory, mainly involving in sardines, near the roundabout of the Kamunting Industrial Area (near the Futsal building), is welcoming the visitors with a foul, pungent smell . What more, the roundabout itself is nothing to shout about, for an attractive place like Taiping.

Just look at the nearby town of Parit Buntar. It has eye catching man made landscapes and structures, at every corners and roundabouts of the town. A case in example, is the Durian Structure, at the roundabout going to the highway.

It is hoped that the Taiping authorities will make studies and make the Taiping roundabouts more inviting to the visitors' eyes. It is eagerly waited.

Coffee Break 2 - relax

Suffering is realized and felt when a good event is compared with a bad one, the good event being the bringer of happiness. Thus, there is no suffering without happiness. So sufferers, do not be disheartened. Happiness is next!

A lucky man, funnily, is one who does not believe in luck but gets it!

Jealousy is a wonderful thing to possess. Though sometimes it brings disaster, often, it urges a person to surge ahead. Be jealous!

War is one of the causes of poverty; poverty is one of the causes of war.

The trouble with pre-election campaigners is that they keep their promises to themselves.

Time and tide waits for no man. Nor for woman!

5Fs for life
Forget your past
Focus on your future
Form the right opinions
Follow the right path
Forge ahead in life

Road safety

Day in and day out, we are hearing, seeing and reading about accidents. Most of the time, it looks like these accidents could have been avoided, if it hadn't been for the buses, lorries, cars having faulty brakes, drivers having plenty of summons, motorcyclists without licences, speeding at breakneck speed, etc, etc. Lives are lost and people maimed.

I know the authorities are trying their best. Just go to the paying counters of the traffic police and you can see the long queues. It shows that the enforcers are doing their job.

Another cause of the accidents are the cyclists. One can see the cyclists, during nights, cycling in the dark, without any lights from their bicycles, endangering vehicles approaching them. The drivers can see them only at the last minute and try to detour accordingly, thus, endangering vehicles coming immediately at the front or back. I remember many years back, all the bicycles were strictly enforced to have front and back lights. I hope this enforcement is brought back again.

And also the checking and correcting of the other causes mentioned above, and the implementing of the enforcements should be more strict and persistent.

Coffee Break 1 - relax

Speech is silvern, but not when you are not needed to speak.

Always show your true colours. It will lead you to lead a truthful life.

Silence is golden, but not when teacher is asking you a question.

Humbleness is to be proud of.

Men have a new way of keeping peace. It is by talking and talking.

Never be lead by a tune unless it is fortune.

Success will lead to pride. Pride will lead to disaster.


Everyone, in this world, breaks something;
an athlete breaks record,
a dishwasher breaks the dish,
an angryman breaks his temper,
an ignorant person breaks the law,
naughty children break the silence,
politicians break promises.

UNITY AT THE TOP

IT IS, INDEED, PLEASING TO HEAR THE PM DATO SRI NAJIB ABDUL RAZAK, SAYING HE WANTS TO CREATE AND SEE A ONE MALAYSIA. I THINK HE REALLY MEANS IT. 

HE CAN START THE BALL ROLLING BY APPOINTING A NON-MALAY, 2ND DEPUTY PRIME MINISTER. THIS WILL PULL IN A LOT OF NON-MALAY CITIZENS TO SUPPORT THE RULING PARTY. THE POST OF PM CAN BE RESERVED FOR MALAYS, IF IT CAN BE DONE IN MALAYSIA. WHO KNOWS, WE CAN EVEN CALL HIM THE FATHER OF UNITY.

NO. LATELY, I DISCOVERED THAT WE CAN NEVER CALL THE PRESENT PRIME MINISTER 'THE FATHER OF UNITY', BECAUSE THAT ACCOLADE HAS BEEN GIVEN TO THE FORMER PM TUN HUSSEIN ONN. IF THIS PM WAS REALLY SUCCESSFUL IN UNITING THE VARIOUS RACES, WHY, WE CAN EVEN NAME HIM 'FATHER OF 1MALAYSIA!

Malaysian Indian

Let us say foreigners ask me what nationality I am. I just cannot say I am a Malaysian. They will want to know why I am black and others brown or yellow. I have to say my ancestors are from India or I am a Malaysian of Indian origin, that is, I am an Malaysian Indian. And the others Malaysian Chinese, Malaysian Malay, Malaysian Iban, Malaysian Kadazan, etc - with the Malaysian in front. I think this is also what our PM meant when he said One Malaysia. We should never just say we are Indians, Chinese, etc.

Many people are for the idea of telling ourselves plainly just Malaysians. They want all the forms or whatever application papers to be filled as just Malaysian, rather than his or her race. This, I think, is impractical in the long run, where the restructuring of society is concerned.

Mahathir's Dilemma

The two bi-elections that the BN lost say enough. It's time for Tun Mahathir to fade away from politics, gracefully. I do respect him a lot and I cannot bear to see him attracting insults from the people of our nation. So do some others, who still try to show their influence, even though, they are not a force to be reckoned with anymore.

Looks like Mahathir can never lie low, as he had been too used to be in the limelight for 22 years. He had always wanted and liked his voice to be heard all over the world. That was why he insistently gave anti-western speeches, touching, especially, on the American administration, wherever he went.

However, it is time for him now to really realise his current situation and keep some sort of a control on his forays.